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  1. hoiyinli says

    A totally relevant topic! I think there’s some great deal of romanticism in on-again off-again relationships. It’s like how writers find inspiration in writing from pain and bad experiences. It’s like some sort of drug and isn’t it so fantastic to write about how you overcome that sort of thing? I feel the same goes for relationships! I think we just have to determine what is best for us. The logical/rational against the emotional/intuitive.

    • LauraJ says

      I’m terrible at over romanticising and thinking on-again off-again relationships are really passionate and exciting. I’ve gone back to one guy repeatedly and it is like a drug. I remember watching a documentary on Elizabeth Taylor and thinking her and Richard Burton had such an amazing thing. I can’t dispute that because I wasn’t in the relationship, but from an outside view their on and off marriages seemed like a nightmare. Would you say you’re more logical or emotional?

      • hoiyinli says

        That’s a tough question because like you, I’m such an introvert that I tend to keep a lot of feelings to myself rather than exert them. On a casual day, I will not tell you how I am really feeling unless it is super important or if we were caught up in the moment having a heart-to-heart conversation – that is just the nature of my personality. I have been told that I’m a pretty chilled out person and sometimes probably too chilled for my own good so people often find it hard to read me.

        When it comes to relationships, I think I am less emotional because I am less clingy and am generally not emotionally invested into a relationship (at least not at this moment). I have to have my own space too. Cos of that, I’d probably say I’m slightly more logical than I am emotional.

        • LauraJ says

          I use to be more logical but somehow ended up emotional. I think logic helps you avoid heartbreak though. Maybe it also depends on the person you’re with and how invested you are.

  2. Storm says

    My relationship has been very off again on again with my fiance. Especially during the first year together. It’s hard to stay broken up with someone when you both love eachother so much, even if you know that there’s something not quite right in the relationship. Your logic and tough skin tell you to leave, then your idealism, hope and romantic soul tells you that all the problems in the relationship will be resolved if you just keep up that hope and don’t quit. It’s quite the challenge finding the balance between love, happiness, sadness and success. Between realism and idealism.

    • LauraJ says

      You’ve described this perfectly! I’ve been struggling with a relationship that’s basically hot and cold, with my idealism and romanticism telling me to stay, while my mind is saying move on.
      I think it’s about making the tough decision to honestly ask if things could ever change and if you’re happy to live your life in an unbalanced situation. I’m not 100% there yet in answering these question.

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