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  1. The Life of Jea says

    I feel like it’s getting harder and hared to get to know people. Not too long ago my mum said that she didn’t like to leave comments on social media anymore, even when it was about people she know well. Apparantly, the swedish ones stay with their little group of friends and only answer each other, but her spanish friends tend to always answer back. (It’s a lot about drinking wine and travel on swedish social media, and she doesn’t do either.)
    I love social media, Instagram and my blog, I’ve met so many wonderful people and there’s always someone to talk to. IRL? Nah… it’s just too hard…

    • LauraJ says

      Social media and blogging have been fantastic for meeting people and especially with connecting over certain issues. There’s so many things I’ve been able to discuss on my blog that I haven’t spoke about in person.
      Women do usually form little groups and from an outside perspective, they seem hard to join. I think a lot more needs to be said and done about females supporting each other.

      • The Life of Jea says

        Yes! Since I got my chair I’ve started to talk to so many different kinds of people on forums about that. And when I started my blog, I’ve met so many wonderful people (like yourself 🙂 ) and on instagram, people just drop by and give a compliment or a nice word every now and then, I love that!
        But to really have that IRL female support group is so hard… I’m not sure why that is…

        • LauraJ says

          I guess the world is a little more selfish. Everyone is fixated on their goals and being successful. And it’s hard to make friends because most people travel and communication gets tough. In some ways, online friends are always there while offline are here and there.

  2. kayleighrosee says

    I agree. It particularly seems to become a competition when people achieve something amazing and post about it on social media. Rather than congratulating and supporting genuinely- it becomes a competition who knows them most, who’s better friends with them, who is prouder? It’s bizarre. I like to keep my friendship circle small and strong. A few true friendships mean a lot more than lots of fake ones.

    Great post! I loved reading this!

    • LauraJ says

      That’s so true! Even when a celebrity dies, it becomes a thing to talk about how close you were rather than focus on the actual person. It’s like some people see others as a kind of stepping stone to further themselves. True friendships definitely mean more than fake ones!

      Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment. x

  3. hoiyinli says

    Beautiful read as always. 🙂

    This made me think about school again. When you mentioned about how you didn’t want to hang out with a girl due to her geekiness, this reminded me of how my friend didn’t want to hang out with this girl (who was sort of part of our classmate/friendship group). She was geeky and branded uncool by my friend because of her fashion sense so in a lot of ways, she judged her and didn’t look to get to know her better. I really sympathised with this at the time because I was once really geeky too. My other friend constantly had a go at her because really, what has she ever done to her?

    I remember one time, I wore a checkered shirt to college mostly buttoned up but apparently it wasn’t cool and very unsexy so she told me to unbutton some of it to otherwise expose some chest area. I wasn’t very impressed with this and obviously never listened to her. Now looking back, it’s mad to think that that happened when I was 16/17.

    We don’t hang out anymore but I’m happy to know the geeky girl is doing rather well in life – married, living abroad and has found her true group of friends who aren’t gonna shun her or judge her.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! I use to be really isolated in school so I was very concerned with how I fit in. The girl didn’t really have much in common with me, but looking back I do feel I could have made more effort, having known she could have done with extra friends.

      It’s kind of like with social media. Some people just associate themselves with others who they feel are influencers or beneficial in some way. It’s nice that the girl you’re talking about is doing well.

      Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!

  4. Rebecca says

    I found this so interesting- now I think about it, this is all so true! I think women have a particular idea of what friendship should look like and maybe that’s restricting us all a bit… If you click with someone then there shouldn’t be any more to it

    • LauraJ says

      I don’t have a particular group of friends. So I have people who don’t really know each other. And rather than appreciate them, I’d look at shows like SATC and wish I had this close set who did everything together.
      I think women are told or promoted this idea of what a friendship should look like. Glad you found the post interesting and thank you for reading 🙂

  5. J | thenellybean says

    This made me think and certainly reflect on my friendships with my girl friends at school (and even now!). What you said about the pecking order is certainly very real, and I still see it everywhere I go. It’s time for people to grow up and be friends with people for the people they are, female or otherwise!

    • LauraJ says

      When I was writing this post, it did make me realise that from a young age, female friendships have had a lot to do with exclusion. I remember going to birthday parties and within a group of friends, everyone had their BFF and other close person who they HAD to sit with. I think women in general should get over their TV friendship goals and focus on the genuine people in their lives. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

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