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  1. Stormy Dormy says

    I think it’s up to the individuals – if it’s what the people involved want then that’s fine. It becoming a norm though..? Sex (between a man and a woman at least) always has the chance of creating life (unless there are special circumstances). I personally think casual sex isn’t a great thing for this reason. To me, it feels pretty irresponsible. It’s not something I believe in strongly enough to think anything less of anyone who chooses to do it though.

    I don’t see it as being taboo at all in 2019. In fact, I think it’s pretty normal for any single adult to have fairly casual sex.

    • LauraJ says

      I think casual sex has become more accessible and it’s shown more on films and on the TV. But I still think there’s a stigma around it. Maybe that’s just from the people I’ve spoken to. I’ve noticed a lot of girls like the idea of a chase and want a guy to know that they can’t just have sex with them straight away.

      I think it’s up to individuals as well but like you I feel it’s irresponsible. If I was to ever have first date sex, I’d have to be really open with expectations. Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  2. The Life of Jea says

    Times have really changed, and yet so many refuse to admit that they have changed with it.
    As long as people feel comfortable with their choice, to do or not to do, that’s all that matters. But it’s pretty horrible how some men praise each other for sleeping with someone on the first date, and then belittle women that do the same. And it doesn’t really add up either 🙂
    It’s a much needed post, I think a lot more people should read it and think about how they feel about it!

    • LauraJ says

      It’s so annoying that men are praised for lots of sex while women are made to feel guilty and shameful. That’s one thing with first date sex and casual sex in general that annoys me.
      I think if people do decide to go ahead with it, they have to be aware of the possibilities. Sometimes people put too much emphasis, they think sex will turn to love.

  3. thelonelyauthorblog says

    This was fascinating. Amazing how times have changed. I remember when it was such a taboo. Not sure if I agree with the three hour time limit onm a first date. What if it’s going great. I tend to think a little go with the flow is in order (which could also mean first time sex). But have always liked it when a woman denies my request and leaves something for the next date. A little curiosity goes a long way.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you Andrew! Well, I had a first date once that went on for hours. But it was weird because we had great conversation, yet we didn’t have chemistry that made it feel as though we’ve known each other for years. So on our second date, it was really awkward because I felt I had run out of conversation.
      I guess it depend on how it’s going though. Curiosity is always good. Though first time sex never usually reveals all.

  4. questionsfromateenager says

    This was such an interesting read. Like you said, the digital age sure has a lot to do with the fact that 1) online dating is becoming less stigmatized and 2) that especially women feel more free to express their sexuality. But I do feel like dating apps and such have created a subculture in society, where short term flings are becoming the norm. I actually wrote an article about this last year – about the rise of the hookup culture – because this is something we all have felt or lived, especially women. I love your articles on societal standards, more of them please! xx

    • LauraJ says

      There are so many terms now like breadcrumbing and ghosting. One thing I want to write about is options. There’s countless people online looking for love so it’s easy to go on lots of dates and hook up without feelings.
      I hate that I now link online dating to casual sex. I joined a dating site last year and went on a date with a guy who seemed really nice. But he was trying to get me back to his and it completely ruined the romance.
      I love writing articles on societal standards so there’s definitely more to come! xxx

  5. Infinite Living says

    I truly enjoyed reading this article as always Laura, your perspectives are so well thought, well backed with research and I love your choice of words and writing style 🙂

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you so much! I thought it was really interesting researching and seeing the different opinions. Appreciate your thoughts. 🙂

I would love to read your thoughts!

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