My year began with a photo shoot on a London bridge, overlooking an orange horizon. I attended my first PR events – one at the iconic BAFTA, interviewed some incredible people as a writer, and spent time working dreams and fulfilling ambitions. All with a dash of pain and a regrettable short haircut.
If 2017 was the year I launched my blog and kickstarted life as a writer, 2018 was the year I lived it. I found my voice – discovered what I wanted to say and how I wanted to say it. But the funny thing about life – each time it teaches you, prepare to educate yourself once more. You never really understand your mind’s complexity.
Speaking to Guru Ashta-deb, she challenged me to rethink. Why am I obsessed with organisation? What events happened to make me anxious with mess? And what affected my insecurity – is it the models and the Instagram girls, or the upsetting memories of childhood? Etched on my skull like a scar healing visibly.
Conversing with different opinions
We grow tough in our views. Trapped in caves of lost freedom. We believe this and we want that. We are working dreams because of this… and aiming for goals because of that. It takes the privilege of meeting an intricate mind, to develop ourselves. And so, in 2018, my opportunity has been to talk to those who diverse in conversation I’ve not encountered.
Barcelona made me feel alive. Floods of sadness soaked away to bright splendour. The beautiful architecture and slow-pace of wander, gave me hope to believe that what doesn’t happen immediately upon desire, will occur soon enough. You just have to live, enjoy your presence and find patience. On social-media, the outlook is to work like a McDonalds 24 hours restaurant, never slowing down. In reality, exploring for fun and enjoyment, is part of success. What’s a dream without it?
There have been many first’s in my year of working dreams. First facial at the Harley Street Skin Clinic, and first chemical peel. First Cuban cigar smoked; interviewee at 5* hotels and with a CEO. I could go through my twelve months of greatness and failure, astonishing moments and bland, bleak days. Finally losing the weight I convinced myself would freeze-off after a week of vitamins and air.
My achievements are explained by my lesson this year to understand my mind. People declare, “I try to change my thoughts.” Asked how, and there’s usually little evidence. If we don’t know what has caused our troubles, elevated our fears and burdened our stresses, how can we fix them? And if we don’t take time to improve our minds and enforce change, how can we expect difference?
You can have all the will power in the world to achieve your New Year resolutions, and yet fail miserably if you’re not sure how to edit your train of thoughts. Question yourself, speak to experts, meditate and stretch. My conversation with Guru Ashta-deb altered my perceptions. If the chance is possible to communicate or read a book by a person who has acquired knowledge in mindset and behaviour, I believe in saying yes.
My failures are explained by my need to still learn how I process thoughts. 2018: Working dreams, opportunity and pain.
How would you describe your 2018 and what changes do you want to make for the year ahead?