Did you know that more men write self-help books than women, but women are the biggest fans of reading? Maybe there’s a lack of masculinity in running to a book for help, or maybe women are hardwired to believe they need fixing. What if, we’re already perfect? What if that thought is so much more than a throwaway message; perhaps it’s the real secret?
Nobody is a winner, all we do is make promises like they are bets,
If the casino boss is our karma, we are forever in debt. We are rolling high on roller-coasters and throwing up at the end,
Yes I adore you and will always be for you, but I love myself more.
What are self-help books teaching us that we can’t teach ourselves? As I finished watching the documentary on laws of attraction, I started to wonder. Why did I not know how important it is to remain positive? Has life been that cruel, or have I programmed myself into society’s belief that growth means change?
Before I was old enough to have two digits in my age, insecurity reached the back of me. I wanted to play freely and be social with all the other kids, but this whisper in my mind, told me I was unlikable. I remember a huge picnic – my mum joined her friends whose children were friends with me and my sister. Everyone went to play, and I sat there with the adults. My heart was afraid of being left out.
My psyche from that moment on – or maybe from another memory, because my mind can’t precise twenty-years of history, began to focus on adaptation. If I could just have my hair as nice as the popular people, or wear those butterfly clips they keep wearing – mini, glittery wings made up of blue and pink sparkles.
Then I’ll have all the friends in the world. That little, wishful thinking in my early years, hasn’t really gone away. It’s merely transformed. Do you ever feel like you have a yearning to improve? Millennial’s apparently are soaking up this thirst for self-help. Forbes wrote a piece mentioning how self-improvement can become an addiction.
Marketing on women
To live as an already perfect woman, you have to physically exude sex appeal and beauty. That’s a message hard-hitting strongly on all girls who stereo-typically spend vast pay on cosmetics and fashion. So, the idea of being better was once solely focused on that aspect. And to find happiness in myself, I did everything the advertisers suggest.
I tried all the latest products, I experimented with my hair; lost a lot of weight. It was only when my acne cleared up and I dropped a couple of stone, that people started to compliment my physical appearance. Funnily enough, I find with Instagram and blogging, it’s shaped the concept of mental health and mental healing, as equally as it has with outside looks and aiming for ripped bodies.
Now we’re bundled with advice on organising, keeping track of time and practising self-love. While I’m a huge believer in this appeal and working on being your best self, I now realise that there’s a wide difference between building on what you want, and trying to live in harmony.
What’s worth staying the same?
It’s a battle you must have with yourself – what’s really worth noting, and what’s already perfect? Because I’m not a morning workout person, I like day-dreaming in bed when the world is asleep, and I like getting creative with my routine. Some days dinner is late, and sometimes I’m hopeless in love.
Does that really need implemented change, or will that naturally occur as I get older? Could life have all the answers already, and all I need to do, is actually live? I’ll continue in my adventure of being my healthiest, working out and researching on all I can find, though I’m going to take the long-road and deliver on positive thoughts and determined goals. If my bed doesn’t get made along the way, I’m okay.
What if you’re already perfect, and life gives you imperfections? What’s your take on change – when do you allow life to guide you, and when do you force yourself to make a new choice?