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  1. jyo says

    Great article…really helped re-inforce that self love is a journey not a destination, as I too struggled with that that meant. This provide a lot more clarity for me at the right time. Thanks so much for sharing Laura.. Greetings from India.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! I’m so glad we continued to talk from Instagram to blogging!! It took me a long time as well, to realise it’s a journey and not a destination. Beautifully put! 🙂

  2. K.M. Sutton says

    I LOVED this post! You not only summed this up, but wrote so beautifully what it is. Self-love is internal not external. It is about being content with who you are, where you are at. It is an ever evolving journey that changes throughout life and some days you will succeed and others you won’t, but just be okay with letting yourself be. That for me is what it means. Thanks for sharing sweets! <3

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you always for your words! I need new adjectives to say how meaningful they are!! You equally summed up your thoughts perfectly – “ever evolving journey”.
      I think that’s the thing. People see self-love as something to finish or complete like a piece of art. But it’s more abstract and open than that 🙂 x

      • K.M. Sutton says

        You are very welcome sweets! Awe you are the best! And thank you! THAT is so true. It is always a work in progress. Not something that can just be completed and we can move on to the next self-improvement. Thanks again for sharing. I love these thoughts and conversations! <3

  3. sgmart187 says

    Great Thoughts! I think of self care almost like refilling a gas tank, you’re topping yourself out in order to avoid burnout. But I don’t think that you can accomplish anything in the long run unless you are willing to love yourself, flaws and all.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! That’s an interesting way of looking at it. I agree – in the long run it has to be bigger, but day-today, self-care can keep you going.

  4. Beyoutiful says

    Love this and can related as always! I’ve kind of reached the point in my life where I realized self love was just being myself and spending more time loving myself/personality/talents. Great post girl <3

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you!! I really like spending time with myself and I don’t think people say that enough. Like alone time kind of recharges me. And being yourself is really what self love is about right. x

  5. Saydee says

    I realised that for me self love was the moment I was able to say no to things, people and situations without feeling guilty. Self love to me means putting me first, and having my own interest at heart.

    • LauraJ says

      Yes, I wrote a post on this last year. I use to always say yes to people, even when I didn’t want to. But sometimes you have to say no and that is a part of loving yourself enough to put yourself first. 🙂 Thank you for reading!

  6. anhistorianabouttown says

    I read an article at the beginning of the year where the idea that instead of continually pushing self-care (and pushing the relevant Instagram and blog posts), we should focus on creating a life that we don’t feel we need to constantly escape from, which really stuck with me! I think that building a life you truly love and like is the best form of self-love, even if it take a a while!

    • LauraJ says

      That’s interesting. I think a lot of people kind of wish for a different life, or they think – once I get this, this and this, then I’ll be happy. And then a lot of people just accept their circumstances.
      I guess when you go for what you want, you get a huge satisfaction and happiness which naturally adds to self-love and your contentment.

  7. You Can Always Start Now says

    Great video. I feel self-love is liking myself, focusing on the positives. As I age I’m more okay with who I am. Not apologizing for it – this is the package deal with it. Being a good person and looking at myself in the mirror and knowing I’m going my best on any given day.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! I’m preparing to get ready for joining YouTube. I love the way you put that. I agree – not apologising especially or feeling bad about who you are. I think a lot of self-love has to do with acceptance.

  8. It Girl says

    Oh Laura, your posts always make me wonder! I think I’m still trying to figure out what self-love means to me. So far, I’ve been trying to get as many “good” moments in my life as possible, but now I’m not sure if that’s all that matters to me. I just know that I’ve always fantasized that one day I will reach this perfect zen when I will be content with myself 100%, but I’m not sure if that’s how it actually works haha.

    • LauraJ says

      What do you mean by good moments? Do you mean like trying to live life to the fullest?
      Sometimes I don’t think you can reach 100% zen, in the same way you can’t go through life never expecting to cry or be angry. But I think the goal is to keep pushing and get to a place where you are not faultless, but comfortable enough to say this is me – I’m not perfect but I’m good.
      I’m not a guru by any shot though so who knows haha!

      • It Girl says

        I think what you said is very true. I’m a perfectionist so it’s hard for me to accept anything less than that though, but I’m working on it. And yes, by good moments I mean live life to the fullest and do new things. However, I feel like I get caught up with doing all these things without actually enjoying it? For example, I don’t feel like going out on the weekend, but I know if I stay in I will feel like Im missing out and not making my life good enough because of it. That kind of thinking is a little crazy, I know haha

        • LauraJ says

          I’m a perfectionist too – want everything to be perfect and never satisfied.
          I think most people will relate to that. That FOMO feeling. And sometimes people tell you – you have to do this and you have to do that, and I think – why? Like everyone told me I had to get drunk every weekend in my teenage years. I didn’t, and I don’t have have any regrets.

  9. Melina Elisa says

    self-love and self-care can mean so many different things to different people. Depending on my age, and what were my needs and wants, my definition of self-love has changed. Sometimes I need to exercise in order calm down my anxiety and stress. Sometimes I need to take a bubble bath. Sometimes I need to read a book and sun bathe all day. Sometimes what i need is to binge on television. This was such a great post Laura xxx

    Melina | http://www.melinaelisa.com

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you girl! I think what I was trying to get across, is that self-love is not just short term tasks. Like I spent years trying to always get my hair done nice and lose weight. But it didn’t make me any more happier in myself.
      Where as now, I try to focus on being kinder and liking myself even on my darker days. But exercise and bubble baths can have a great effect. Exercise especially, I always feel good after. xxx

    • LauraJ says

      Yes it’s a balancing act. I always say – loving yourself but not being in love with yourself 🙂

  10. Infinite Living says

    these pampering activities are short-lived and non-existent steps.- This is so true! Self- love is something if we are able to cultivate and use for strength during weaker times. Another wonderful post Laura!

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! I think there was a time in my early twenties when I felt ugly whenever I didn’t feel glamorous. So I would constantly get my eyebrows done and buy new clothes etc, not to express myself, but to try and induce a type of self-love.
      Though it’s temporary and I’ve now realised you need more. Thank you as always for your generous words.

  11. hoiyinli says

    I think self-love is a very instagrammable theme nowadays that its true definition can get lost amidst the waves and you’re so right, it’s not about getting your nails done or necessarily about getting your hair cut – cos let’s face it, those things are temporary. It’s really about you, and feeling good in yourself, about yourself and trusting that you are indeed good enough. It might seem harder to achieve because of social media but it’s really not about the glitz and glam…self-love is the same formula with or without IG…it’s a moment is just being and enjoying that stage of simply just being.

    • LauraJ says

      Exactly! I think if pampering helps you to feel better than why not – I’m all for it. But in the long run, self-love cannot be entirely claimed every time you get a beauty treatment. It has to be there when your hair needs a cut and your nails are in need of filing. You have to just enjoy being you and find contentment. And how you perfectly phrased – simply just being.

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