If you’re lacking in knowledge of Ted Talk history, Simon Sinek created the 3rd most viewed speech. The video I watched in particular, addresses the millennial generation – those born roughly after 84.
He notes how many of us grew up in a belief system of being told that we can have anything we want. How the loser of a race can win a medal. A concept emphasising that we can all be winners and achievers.
Until we get to the real world and discover that our mistakes don’t win medals; we can’t just say what we want and boom it appears.
From a young age, I witnessed this happen. Parents would produce their kids homework for them; create their artwork in order for them to come first. Even at such an age I knew this was wrong.
After a life of always being sheltered, kids grow up not knowing how to manage. Add that to social-media and our obsession with phones, it’s a recipe for a lack of coping mechanisms.
Sinek pointed out that we now demand instant gratification. We can receive what we want in a matter of moments.
You want a date – just swipe right, you want a film – just watch Netflix. You can binge on box sets and no longer wait for the next episode to arrive.
And when you feel insecure or you’re lacking attention, head to social-media and upload a photo. Go to your phone and message a friend.
The world of speed and technology might make our lives easier, though the price we pay is that our tough mentalities are lost.
You might be sitting there and thinking that this idea is over generalised. But I see this all the time. I see it with bloggers.
How many create a blog and then wait a month or two before they start to complain. They start to say that it’s hard and that their losing motivation.
How many bloggers will look at a successful one, and just try to copy with expectations that it will also work for them.
‘Oh this blogger posts loads of behind-the-scenes and it works, so I’m going to post behind-the scenes’.
They do and surprising it makes no difference. They don’t have the successful bloggers following. And then they get mad and desire to give up.
Likewise with Instagram, people will try to emulate the pages doing well. If it fails, they say ‘I don’t like Instagram’. They move on and try something else.
Results without work
There is a laziness epidemic; expecting the world without really trying.
Realising a month in – ‘hang on a sec, I can’t just get money. Blogging is actually tiring and it takes time’.
People just want the answers without figuring it out for themselves.
I’m accomplished in the sense that I launched my writing career; however I’m not living off my blog. Yet others will ask me how I got here. They’re oblivious to the fact that it took 5 months before I had repeat readers coming back.
When self-hosted, I went from a hundred new followers a week, thousands of views a month to minus ten followers a week and scraping below fifty views a day.
I didn’t throw in the towel and have a breakdown. I didn’t lose drive. Instead I kept going and months later my views are shooting back up.
Although I’m not perfect and I myself have been victim to the instant gratification effect.
I nearly closed my Facebook page after a few weeks and a lack of popularity. Until it occurred that I’m half-heartedly using it.
People often view the results; they see you at the top of the mountain and not climbing. Then they want to stand at the top without climbing. They want the solution without the journey. And they take interest once they see the end results and disappear during the process.
When it doesn’t go to plan, it’s easy to blame the world.
It’s easy to say that Instagram’s new algorithm is ruining our social-media lives.
Sometimes other forces are in the wrong. Be that as it may, we have to be accountable. If you sat down and asked yourself whether you’re doing everything that you can, most-likely your answer will be no.
Being too engaged
Sinek said that our constant engagement won’t deliver ideas.
He spoke of phone addiction. Our phones are besides us as we sleep; we check them upon waking, we glance when there is any ‘awkward moments’.
I have a terrible habit of reaching for my mobile whenever I feel anxious. Rather than dealing with my issues, I conceal them with a device. When I struggle to communicate – there is my phone.
Gosh forbid you go to the bathroom without it (I do for hygiene reasons), or you sit to watch T.V with your phone in another room.
The more engaged we are, the less we have to assort our feelings. Similarly, if you break up with a partner, you no longer have to crave them. You can immerse yourself in social investigation work (stalking) and a piece of them gets to stay.
When my long distance boyfriend moved away and stopped giving me his time, I began sending explicit photos.
Miraculously he quickly responded. I knew that it was about sex and my body, yet I kept doing it. Because he gave me a form of attention, regardless that it didn’t make me happy.
I’ll put my hand high and state that when I’m having a bad day or I feel pretty rough, I can log on to social media and pick up a list of comments to read.
The last significance learnt from Sinek, is that the chemical dopamine is proven to be triggered when we get a response.
Our devices offer temporary relief that’s highly addictive.
There are copious factors in our live that can give us instant gratification.
Nevertheless, we shouldn’t solely rely on desires.
The world doesn’t owe us anything; doing what you dream is a privilege.
Blogging is a privilege, readership is a privilege. What right do any of us have to demand clear-cut answers?
Working out is a privilege and so too is career success. It doesn’t matter how the superficial online world is shown. It’s irrelevant that so-and-so has this or has that.
And as a generation, several of us fail when we try to take short cuts. It’s the moments when you want to give up, that shape who we become.
Walt Disney repeatedly failed. Imagine if he threw his plans away and complained that it was too hard. Or those other animators have reached the top younger or faster.
Instant gratification when your pizza arrives fast and your clothes arrive the next day. Not with your ambition, love and life. There’s more to it than that.
How do you feel about instant gratification?
If you loved this post read: Why is there No Valuable Content